Saturday, June 12, 2010

future facebook statuses..

i will continue adding to this..because good things pop in my head all the time..and i just cant change my status that often.

1) a wise girl kisses but doesnt love, listens but doesnt believe, and leaves before she is left.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

summertime lovin

Hey... its been a few days since I've last posted anything on here....and I meant to post on those days too..but then i got distracted. During the day something would happen...and I would say to myself I should write about that..or I should post that...and then when the time comes to do it..I totally forget about it.
Anyways..friday was my birthday..and I loved it. It was great to see friends I hadnt seen in awhile..and it was fun watching all my friends interact together..because some of them didnt know one another. I love all my friends..and I realize..i wouldnt be the person I am today without them. There are so many people that the Lord has blessed me with in this life that Im continuously grateful for. I know more than anyone that Im not always easy to be around...Im not always the nicest person in the world..even though I try so hard to be. There are times I demand I am right...when in reality I am wrong. I get caught up in the moment and forget to say thank those who really deserve one. There are so many people that I love...but I to hastily forget to tell them. Knowing all of that makes me sad.. becuase I realize life is short..I realize we never know when it could end. I go to bed mad..and I dont forgive easily..and the words I am sorry..dont come out of my mouth enough. SO....heres to all my friends...all my family...and everyone that puts up with me. I know Im not some famous person..and Im not the most incredible person in this life... and what I say might not be talked about on CNN...and all those newspapers...and I know you wont see my picture in a magazine...and honestly..for all of that I am forever grateful, but I want you to know..that I am so thankful for you. I am so thankful for all the laughter..and hugs. I am so thankful for the listening ears and shoulders to lean on when Im not the strongest person in the world. I am so thankful for you still loving me...even after I have been a witch to deal with. I am so thankful for you still being my friend..and am so thanful that you are still willing to ride with me...even if im not the greatest driver. Im so thankful for all of that and more..
While driving three hours in my car myself!...i had alot to think about. I thought about the friends wedding I just got done attending...I thought about my birthday the day before..and I how even if I had my doubts..I shouldve realized all along that my friends would make it grand and wonderful..I thought about my little miss Katlyn..and how strong she is..and how incredible she is...and how there is no way I could ever be just like her.. I thought about a song that had just come on the radio and how true it was. (A Father's Love-Bucky Covington). I thought about all those nights that I screamed and yelled...about stupid stuff..and how spoiled and rotten and ungrateful I probably seemed.. In reality. I am grateful..even if I dont say it.. I thought about a guy...who confused me...and I think some of my friends too.. I thought about what he said over and over again..and I dont..know..i wish I knew what to do..but i still dont.
I know who I am...somewhat..I know who I want to be.. I still have questions..about everything.. that ever goes on..but I think im supposed to. I dont know..the plans God has for me.. I just pray that I am smart enough to listen to him. I know my stubborness gets in the way sometimes..and I pray that it wont.
So...right now...I am Heather Marie...and I am a 19 year old sophomore in college that loves her Lord...her friends..and her family(even my yorkie that keeps barking at me). I am a person who makes mistakes..and always will..I am stubborn...insecure...and a little bit crazy...and misunderstood..but I am ME.....and thats who i want to be.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Not so sunny day....

So.. when i got up today...after maybe an hour of sleep, I told myself that I was going to have a great day! You know, I try to be positive, but just to let you know...when you tell yourself your going to have a great doesnt always mean you will.
The day wasnt horrible..ill tell you that.. AND.. I hate complaining but what the going to do it anyways. I wish I could have slept last night..but body decided to hurt(? i dont know why) and made it almost impossible to even lie down. Anyways...thats done and over with..and i was ready to just move on with the day anyways.
I went to my nannying job...and let me remind you I watch a six year old..and a nine year old. Both completely different..but the same in so many ways. Make any sense? Probably not..I realize..but its true!!! I love those girls.. and I just met them. I think my favorite part of the day with hearing words of wisdom from a nine year old. I had the six year old brushing her teeth..and she kept complaining that it hurt.. .lol..well..out of nowhere the nine year old pops in and says... "its the cost of hurts!!!" I laughed sooo hard...and said wow..i wish i knew that when i was your age. Maybe I did..just subconsiously...but i never thought beauty really hurt..but i thought beauty was hard..You almost 19:) but yes..ill admit..i dont really know how to put makeup on...and me and my hair..ya we never get along! lol. I then took these two little munchinks to get their hair done at the salon in town for their dance recital.. and we both learned..that asking these girls to be asking for a miracle. Anyways they finally got done...and I might be a little biased..but I think ...they have to be the most beautiful girls on their dance team.
The day ended with them ..and i did come home and take a nap! Thank the Lord!!!... but after that..i just sit here and think about guys...and life...and friends.. Guys...well I dont understand them..and am really confused by a particular one lately..but..I guess thats life. Maybe ill just give up on him.. I tried before..but i just couldnt. lol.but this time..maybe i can!! Anyways.. i also have been missing my dear friend Jenna Mae today..and realize how much life has changed in the 3 years that she has been gone. I told her everything.. we had no secrets!! and I miss that.. I miss knowing that I could run to her..and no matter how different we were from one another..she would give me the best advice for me.. she put herself aside..and her opinions aside..and answered my questions for me.. (maybe with a little giggles here and there..and im not going to say she never made fun of me..because we made fun of one another all the time! ) Anyways..then my dear friend sharidan called me..(sharidan..i just had to mention you if your reading this right now) and i wanted to cry. Its soo wierd not seeing her like everyday..and I thought at first it might be kinda nice...that way we dont get tired of oneanother and want to kill eachother all the time..but I lied to myself..i kinda need her alot more.than i originally realized.
My roomates..Courtney andAlex..are AMAZING!! yes...they know they are.. but I just have to say that anyways. I love being with them...all the time!!! We tend to be quite wierd at times.. but thats me... lol..and if someone doesnt like be it!
Well..thats all for now!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Sunny Days!!

Well first of all you must understand me. I tend to be completely random...and sometimes I'm pretty sure my friends,siblings, and family members would love for me to just shut up. BUT-- if you know me, that just doesnt very well happen. Anyways today was a pretty good day. I was worried all weekend that I wouldnt be able to be very productive this week, and well I would like to say that was changed. I still work all week(i nanny for two adorable girls), but that leaves my evenings with my roomates(one is a sorority sister..and the other is her sister) to get things done. One thing on the agenda was a walk.. we did above and beyond a normal walk. We walked forever! Im pretty sure we walked all over this town. I love to walk..and can't wait for more. Yup, dont worry.. I talked the entire time. was a sunny day.. both becuase im in a good mood, and because the sun decided to shine. As the day was going on though, I realized that Nebraska seems to never is nice 2 days in a row i swear. This week better be a sunny week though, becuase this girl... turns 19 on Friday! Watch out world..another adult is here!
SO.. ya.. this might not be too interesting yet... but I have some crazy random thoughts at times..and will share them!

o and p.s....
surprisingly...i can be a very quiet and shy person when you dont know me.